Thursday, August 18, 2011

some feelings...


Recently i have been thinking a lot...
about stuff, everything..from the food i eat, the way i look, how i work,how i feel to how my family and friends are in msia or any parts of the world...
i guess i have too much fee time thinking about stuff like this.
I ask myself, what do i want from life?
every day, every minute, what do i live for?
till this day, i still don't have an answer.
u ask me, what do i want? i will only say, i want the best for my family.
other than that, doesn't matter...

there are times i feel like i know that person, but actually I'm wrong, in fact some times so wrong that i regret knowing them.but i guess this is life. There are always regrets and i have to move on.

Today i ask a college of mine
"why do i feel so tired?, even if i slept like 10hours yesterday?"
i was expecting him to say that i sleep too much.
but instead he answered
"well u have to go out and spend that energy, u know like when u have a bf, u can have sex or u can go exercise"
it then hit me that i really need to get out more...not about the sex part, but about the energy part...what i realize is that I'm not really happy being here..not like i feel despair...but just lonely...
it's not that i don;t go out with frens..just that i dun feel like i belong.
u know the saying, "home is where the heart is?" well, it's exactly what i feel.

i miss my dad...
yesterday one of my college's dad flew from Germany to come see my college...
it's so nice to know that ur dad is here to see u rite ;)
i almost tear when i saw her ran to her dad..lolx!!
anyways, i need to figure out i want...or not I'll still be stuck in this stupid depress way T.T



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